Five Speed, Four Speed, Three on the Tree
Stuff I grow on purpose is barely alive
But the mole tunnels runnin’ up along the drive
And the dandelions and the dreaded pricker bush gonna thrive
Ten hours a day that I give for pay
Keeps me and my wife from both getting’ laid
Put myself in a box with no night and day
If there’s true right livin’ then this ain’t the way
Five speed, four speed, three on the tree
Auto is too leisurely
I prefer to do all the work ‘round here
Running lawnmowers is a full-time job
I’ve got water in my gas and dirt in the carb
Five speed, four speed, three on the tree
Auto is too leisurely
I prefer to do all the work ‘round here
If the zombies come, then the bank will close
And they can cram my mortgage papers right up their nose
And we’ll live debt-free for a week and a day
Til a horde of walking dead start slouching my way
I could write a new verse with my morning Dew
Til my song was as long as a Stephen King novel or two
But if I’m still doing this when I’m forty-two…
If I’m still doing this when I’m forty-two…
If I’m still doing this when I’m forty-two,
Then the plans that I made never came to fruit
And I didn’t have the stones to sail off on my own
And make my own living with my muscles and bones
And my brain and my heart didn’t do their part
Well, that’s a sad story sayin’ I was never that sharp
If you’re rich or you’re poor, then you always want more
And we’re fools if we don’t go get it
Five speed, four speed, three on the tree
Auto is too leisurely
I prefer to do all the work ‘round here.
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